Thanksgiving Bereavement: a brief reflection

It Has Arrived

Today is the first in a string of holidays echoing the approach of my son’s death. Thanksgiving is the last holiday when death didn’t overshadow life.

Two years ago, before dawn could break Monday morning, I would stare death in the face as I pleaded with the Lord for my son’s life not to go out this way.

Levi’s body was much weaker than usual from hours of continual projectile vomiting, as I struggled to help him keep his airway clear of aspiration. He was already medically fragile and this massive gut ejection was atypical. Today, as I write this two years later, I amazed how can still smell it all.

Soon followed...

Advent.

His 7th birthday.

Christmas Eve.

Christmas Day.

New Year’s Eve.

New Year’s Day.

The Day Levi said his spirit was ready to go.

His last pneumonia.

Valentine’s Day.

His four days of actively dying.

His Death.

His Home Vigil.

Lent.

Like a string of beads they all line up. Marking the last 100 days of his life. The beginning of my forever bereaved life.

Today gratitude, grief, past and present are commingling. Swirling around and within my heart. Levi and so many people we have loved come to mind as well.

We are Not Alone

Thanksgiving marks many things for bereaved families. For some it is the first holiday without their loved one. Some it is the season of their death. Some it echos death through loss of place, not going to grandma’s. Loss of togetherness, families don’t gather as they once did as aloneness sets in. Loss of tradition, historical rituals and recipes not as they once were. For some the layers of death begin to settle in to this holiday as the names and faces of many friends and family come to mind and fill our hearts.

We Invite You